among those who laugh, do not weep; among those who weep, do not laugh.”

~Rabbi Hillel

When we moved to Washington, DC, we left our car in California. At least until I find a job that may require me to have an automobile,  we are using public transportation.  “The District” has an outstanding mass transit system composed of Metro Rail and buses that can get you just about anywhere you need to go.  I really love it. Mostly because while on the train or bus, I can read or do work – and yes, play Scrabble^© on my iPhone!   I also do not have to deal with traffic.

Many years ago, when I was a child, I would go into downtown Los Angeles with my grandmother (z’l) to go shopping. My grandmother did not drive, so we always took the bus. It was made very clear to me that I could have a seat on the bus only as long as everyone else was seated. However, the moment anyone older than me got on the bus and there was no seat available, I was to get up quickly and give them my seat.  Back then, I do not recall there being special spaces reserved for “seniors and disabled persons.”  It seems everyone knew that common courtesy was offered to the elderly, the blind, individuals in wheelchairs or with canes, pregnant women, women with babies, etc.

Something has certainly changed in the years since I made those trips downtown with my grandmother. I know I raised my children to get up and give their seat to others. I do not see that those guidelines have been shared with others. Or is it just that “My mother is not around, so I don’t have to play by her rules”? It’s unfortunate.  I stare in wonder while healthy, able young people sit in the front of the bus with music blasting through their ear plugs, eyes fixed to their cell phone screens, fingers busily typing as older or disabled people walk by with no place to sit. If I am not already standing up, I give my seat to the new arrivals. Do I want to put my face up next to these youngsters and tell them to get up? Of course, but it is not my message to deliver (at least according to my husband and children.)  Instead, I’ll use my experiences as an example and deliver the message here:  we must teach our children Derekh Eretz (literally “the way of the land”)/Common decency and good manners. They should know that this is the behavior we expect from them as they travel through life.  After all, isn’t this just an offshoot of the Golden Rule: “Do unto others…”?

Here are a few great books that may support you in your lessons:

Manners written and illustrated by Aliki. ©1997, Greenwillow Books. Ages 4-8. This timeless classic uses role playing and descriptive illustrations to illustrate the Do’s and Don’ts of proper behavior. There is certain to be some giggling while watching bad table behavior, and some knowing smiles regarding sharing and tantrums. In the end, however, everyone should come away with a clear understanding of the proper way to behave in a variety of situations.

Do Unto Otters: A Book About Manners written and illustrated by Laurie Keller. ©2007, Henry Holt and Company. Ages 5-9.  A family of otters has moved in next door to Mr. Rabbit.  Since he does not know anything about otters, he is very nervous that they will be mean, like his previous neighbor, Mrs. Grrrrrrr. As he tells Mr. Owl what he would expect from his new neighbors, it becomes clear that he will have nothing to worry about…as long as he will just “Doo-Dee-Doo unto otters as [he]would have otters Doo-Dee-Doo unto [him].” The delightful illustrations enhance the lessons here.

Mind Your Manners, B. B. Wolf by Judy Sierra. Illustrated by Jotto Seibold. ©2007, Alfred A. Knopf.  Ages 5-9. When the Big Bad Wolf is invited to a tea party at the library, he is not sure what to do. After his best friend, the crocodile, gets out the Big Wide Book of Etiquette and explains the rules of “taking tea,” B.B. decides he will attend. All the major storybook characters are there, and quite frightened when he shows up. But he is on his best behavior, at least as long as he can be.  Hilarity abounds for everyone when B. B. Wolf comes to the party.

365 Manners Kids Should Know: Games, Activities, and Other Fun Ways to Help Children and Teens Learn Etiquette by Sheryl Eberly with Caroline Eberly. ©2011, Three Rivers Press. Ages 9-Adult.  For every day of the year, for every behavioral topic, this mother-daughter team has created a brief, but extremely helpful piece of information often accompanied by an activity or a tip to get you started applying the message immediately. From “Opening Doors” to “Internet Safety,” from “getting Along With Other Kids” to “Being Green,” I was unable to find a topic that was not covered by these two where manners was concerned. Whether you have your child read this to work on some projects or read this as a family and work on things together, there is a wealth of superb information inside these covers.

©2013 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review were provided by my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase.

You will incur no additional cost.

However, I deeply appreciate your support.

When I do send my resume and cover letter, I am optimistic that I will hear back but rarely do. On those infrequent occasions when I get a call and better yet, an interview, I am so hopeful, so filled with joy and expectation. Will this be the opportunity I have been waiting for?

I am not good at putting on masks – I don’t wear makeup, no longer color my hair – what you see is what you get. I have worked long enough and in so many different types of jobs that it would take a lot to shock or surprise me. Yet, I am beginning to wonder if my interviewers do not believe what I say, are not sure my confidence is real. I am wondering if I need to say clearly, “Yes, I have had an abundance of conflict and tribulation in my life. I choose not to dwell on it. I choose to learn from it and move on.”  Perhaps I should shine a brighter light on myself and talk about the many accolades I have received, the praise I have been given. I wonder if adding these statements in my cover letters might get me a few more phone calls.

Actually, I am thinking my next cover letter will simply be my favorite poem with a small note stating, This is all I ask as this is all I need:

To Be of Use

By Marge Piercy from The Art of Blessing the Day. ©1999.  Alfred A. Knopf.

The people I love the best
jump into work head first
without dallying in the shallows
and swim off with sure strokes almost out of sight.
They seem to become natives of that element,
the black sleek heads of seals
bouncing like half-submerged balls.

I love people who harness themselves, an ox to a heavy cart,
who pull like water buffalo, with massive patience,
who strain in the mud and the muck to move things forward,
who do what has to be done, again and again.

I want to be with people who submerge
in the task, who go into the fields to harvest
and work in a row and pass the bags along,
who are not parlor generals and field deserters
but move in a common rhythm
when the food must come in or the fire be put out.

The work of the world is common as mud.
Botched, it smears the hands, crumbles to dust.
But the thing worth doing well done
has a shape that satisfies, clean and evident.
Greek amphoras for wine or oil,
Hopi vases that held corn, are put in museums
but you know they were made to be used.
The pitcher cries for water to carry
and a person for work that is real.

Isn’t that all any of us want?

Happy Reading!

Kathy B.

Avodah/Work is an important part of life. “Six days you shall labor and do all your work…” (Exodus 20:9). Here are some great books to get that point across to your children:

When I Grow Up. Written by Al Yankovic. Illustrated by Wes Hargis. HarperCollins Publishers. ©2011. Yes, the “Weird” All Yankovic of those crazy satires of popular music has written a delightfully funny children’s book about the age old question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Using his trademark rhyming and hysterical scenarios, A.Y. goes from the ridiculous – snail trainer, giraffe milker, gorilla masseuse (my personal favorite!) – to the realistic –butcher, barber, teacher. The joy will be in discovering your own crazy and weird jobs to rhyme along. (Ages 4-8)

Chicken Man. Written and illustrated by Michelle Edwards. NewSouth Books, ©2009. Rody lives on a kibbutz in Israel.  He is a person who loves his work – in the chicken house.  When others see how happy he is there, they want to work in the chicken house as well.  Since life on the kibbutz involves rotating jobs, Rody agrees to try new things. But the chickens love Rody best of all, so they make the decision where he will work. (ages 5-9)

Sky Boys. Written by Deborah Hopkinson. Illustrated by James E. Ransome. Schwartz & Wade Books. © 2006. The Empire State Building is 1,250 feet high and was built in one year and forty five days, during the Great Depression in 1931. This is a tribute to the monumental effort that went into constructing a building that is still a landmark of New York City. (Ages 6-10)

Crunch. Written by Leslie Connor. HarperCollins Publishers. ©2010. There is a serious gas shortage – a “Crunch” – and the Marriss family is in a real bind. The parents are stuck up north waiting for gas to refill the truck so they can get home from their 20^th anniversary trip. The five children – ages 5-18 – are home taking care of each other, the family farm and the family bike shop. Of course, this week EVERYONE needs a bike or their old bike repaired. To top off their stress, there appears to be a bike parts thief loose in the neighborhood. What else could go wrong?

©2013 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.

Books used in this review are from my personal library or were provided by my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon,

I may receive a very small commission on your purchase.

You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

You have changed my grieving into dancing!

Thrown off my mourning clothes and dressed me in joy

So that my whole being might sing to you without ceasing

Pouring out my gratitude without end.

~ from Opening to You: Zen Inspired Translations of the Psalms by Norman Fischer. ©2002. Penguin Putnam, Inc.

It’s as though the Psalm writer is saying, “Life threw lemons at me and God helped me make lemonade! I am so grateful.”  I think my most recent life experiences have opened my eyes to this new meaning.

These life experiences have caused me to think a lot about Resilience.  You see, in the past 6 years my family has dealt with serious medical issues, employment issues, financial issues, unexpected deaths and lots of relocation.

I am not sharing this information to gain pity or because I believe my family has had a more difficult time than any other. During this same time the American economy has been in collapse, a Tsunami hit Japan, an earthquake struck China, Hurricane Sandy hit the east coast and untold other tragedies took countless lives and affected other families all over the world. No, this past 6 years has not been easy…for many people.

What I know for myself during this trying time, however, has been that in spite of my family and friends shaking their heads and wondering “how I was getting through all this,” I never really thought I had any choice but to get through it.

Somewhere, a long time ago, I learned two very valuable lessons

1)  “The best way out is always through.” ~ Robert Frost

2) “That which does not kill us makes us stronger.”  ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Somewhere a long time ago, I learned…Resilience.

I know that reading a boat load of books with excellent values content had a lot to do with my learning Resilience, but so have an unshakeable marriage, a loving family, strong friendships, and a deep faith.  I wish you all these and more in the days ahead.

Happy Reading!

Kathy B.

Here are books that can help you teach your child about resilience:

How Do Dinosaurs Say Goodnight? By Jane Yolen. Illustrated by Mark Teague. ©2000. Scholastic, Inc. Ages 2 -6.  Going to bed in an orderly manner is a good way to make life palatable for everyone.  I grew up with a lot of rules.  My kids probably had a few less, but they still knew where the boundaries were. Rules are important. Rules, boundaries and structure build resilience. The entire How Do Dinosaurs… series is about starting children out with rules. They are all great.

Knuffle Bunny Too: A Case of Mistaken Identity. Written and Illustrated by Mo Willems. ©2007. Hyperion Books. Ages 3 -6.  I love the Knuffle Bunny books. This one is about starting a friendship. If it were not for my friends, friends who I could talk to about anything and everything, I would not have gotten through any of the experiences I have had in my life. Friendships are another way to help children build resilience.

The Kissing Hand. By Audrey Penn. Illustrated by Ruth E. Harper & Nancy M. Leak. ©2006. Tanglewood Press. Ages 4-8.  Chester Raccoon is afraid to go to school. His mom shares the family secret with him – The Kissing Hand.  It is always good to know that no matter what, your family will always be there.

I Can Hear the Sun. Written and Illustrated by Patricia Polacco. ©1996. Penguin Putnam Books for Young Readers. Ages 7-11. A homeless, orphan finds his way to Lake Merritt and begins to assist the caretaker there with the geese. His courage, faith and hope inspire everyone he meets

May B.: A Novel. By Caroline Starr Rose.  ©2012. Schwartz & Wade Books.  Ages  9-12. An incredible story set in the 1800s.  Written in free-verse, a young girl is sent by her parents to help in a neighbor’s homestead in the Kansas prairie. Abandoned by her hosts and burdened by low esteem caused by learning disabilities, she finds the inner strength necessary to insure her own survival.

White Fang. By Jack London. ©1906. Many editions. Ages 11-16. The classic story of a wolf/dog that survives the most terrible abuse at the hands of men, yet its spirit remains unbroken and is reborn with the love and tenderness of a kind and gentle human being.

The Blessing of a B Minus: Using Jewish Teachings to Raise Resilient Teens. By Wendy Mogul, Ph.D. ©2010. Scribner. Adults. An excellent resource for parents looking to raise children into strong adults, this companion volume continues the lessons learned in The Blessing of a Skinned Knee.

©2013 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review  are from my personal library or were provided by my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon,

I may receive a very small commission on your purchase.

You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

My mother died on October 11, 2011. We actually believe she died on October 5, 2011, while having lunch at a local restaurant she, my dad, uncle and aunt had gone to in order to celebrate my father’s birthday. It was there that my mom went into cardiac arrest, slumping down on my dad’s shoulder and being lowered to the floor, unresponsive. Miraculously, there was a nurse in the restaurant at the same time who witnessed what was happening, rushed over and immediately began administering CPR while the paramedics were on their way.

When the paramedics arrived, they used the paddles and epinephrine on my mother THREE TIMES before they got her heart to start beating again. This is the time—according to our family mythology—where mom was in “God’s Negotiation Center” explaining the reasons why she needed a few more days, which she received. Mom came back, much to the surprise of my “former paramedic” brother, much to the relief of my “not ready to lose her” sister, and with enormous gratitude from me, “the 3,000 miles away” older sister.

Things started off well enough. Mom seemed clear about where she was. She was eager to go home (mom hated hospitals.) The doctors were optimistic. I was kept informed of her progress and was making plans to come out to California to assist with her recovery after she was released.

But the terms of “the Negotiation” clearly must have meant leaving us, not to go home to her house in Murrieta, CA, but to go to that Home with a Capital “H” up in the clouds—if you know what I mean—as I suddenly got a frantic call from my brother telling me that if I wanted to say goodbye to mom, I better get on a plane right now and head to California. That is how I found myself traveling on a red eye from Boston to LAX on Kol Nidre last year; sitting in a hospital ICU on Yom Kippur holding my mom’s hand telling her that I loved her, that she was a great mom and that whatever she needed to do was the right decision; sitting with my sobbing sister explaining that we must not be selfish and beg mom to stay if by doing so would require her to live a life of pain and suffering;  and supporting my brother, the medical power of attorney for my parents, who had to discuss the most painful decisions about DNR, medication adjustments and hospital room transfers with our dad and then sign whatever papers were required to make it happen.

All of this sounds like any family’s worse nightmare. However, my sister, brother and I had been a bit estranged for some time prior to this. Not in an “I am never going to speak to you again” way, but if my mother had died suddenly on October 5, we all agree that our relationships would have suffered. Our mother was all that was holding us together.  During those extra 6 days mom “negotiated,” my brother, sister and I, along with our father, came together as a family in a way that bonded us forever. During those 6 days, we each put it all out there, our hopes, our fears, our anger, our sadness, and trusted that the other person would hold that feeling, understand it and take care of it and us. And that is exactly what happened. We were there for each other in a way we had not been since probably when we were very small children.

It was beautiful. It was and is such a gift as that trust continues to this day. Our deepest sadness is that mom had to leave in order for it to happen. But we understand, and so treasure it all the more.

Tonight, my siblings, my father and some of the grandchildren and great-grandchildren will gather to remember mom. Because I am who I am, I needed to prepare a little “ritual,” involving a candle and some poetry. We will say the “Lord’s Prayer” , because that is what my family is comfortable with—and I can handle it. I have been saying the Mourner’s Kaddish for my mom every time I have been in a synagogue, standing up with the mourners at every opportunity. It has given me more comfort than I can say.  I believe my mom appreciates it.

This morning I went to the cemetery with my dad to visit my mom’s gravesite. He put a rose at her grave site. I, of course, placed a small stone there.  When we got back in the car, I said to my dad that I feel like the only spiritual one in the family. He said, “You got that from your mother. She was very spiritual, but she hung around me too long.” (They were married 61 years.)

Thanks, Mom. I’ll put that in my pile of gifts that I thank you for every day, along with your lasagna recipe and the ability to cook for 100 or more people and not bat an eye.

Happy reading,

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review were provided by my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon,

I may receive a very small commission on your purchase.

You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

We are ending on the most important value of all, the study of Torah encompasses them all/talmud Torah k’neged kulam. As the first century Rabbi Ben Bag Bag says about Torah in Pirke Avot /Sayings of the Fathers (5:26) “Turn it and turn it again for everything is in it.” All the values we have read about thus far and so many more can be found in the pages and stories that come from the pages of Torah. Here are a few books to get you and your family started on this important and lifelong mitzvah (commandment):

Naamah and the Ark at Night by Susan Campbell Bartoletti. Illustrated by Holly Meade. Candlewick Press, ©2011. Ages 3-8. Noah’s wife, Naamah, sings the restless animals and her family to sleep during a stormy night aboard the ark. Beautiful collage and watercolor illustrations support the lyrical, rhyming lullaby.

The Seventh Day by Deborah Bodin Cohen. Illustrated by Melanie Hall. Kar-Ben Publishing, ©2005. Ages 3-8. Just like an artist, God worked hard molding, painting and singing the world into being until it was exactly as it should be. Then God rested and created Shabbat.

Abraham’s Search for God by Jacqueline Jules. Illustrated by Natascia Ugliano. Kar-Ben Publishing, © 2007. Ages 4-8. Abraham is considered the father of three great religions: Judaism, Christianity and Islam. As a child he questioned the idol worship of his family and searched for the powerful One God.

The Coat of Many Colors by Jenny Koralek. Illustrated by Pauline Baynes. Eerdmans Books for Young Readers., © 2004. Ages 5-10. The biblical story of Joseph and his coat of many colors is retold in language for the young.

Green Bible Stories for Children by Tami Lehman Wilzig. Illustrated by Durga Yael Bernard. Kar-Ben Publishing, © 2011. Ages 8-11. The  retelling of well known bible stories with “reuse-renew-recycle” lessons.

Masada: The Last Fortress by Gloria D. Miklowitz. Eerdmans Books for Young Readers., © 1998. Ages 11-14. Simon ben-Eleazar, the 17-year-old son of the leader of the Zealots on top of Masada, records the story of the battle between the Roman Army and a fierce group of Jews determined to live as free people in their homeland.

Pharaoh’s Daughter: A Novel of Ancient Egypt by Julius Lester. Harcourt, Inc., © 2000. Ages 12-18. A beautifully told Midrash (story based in Torah) about the life of Moses.

As you read these beautiful stories, you may want to compare them with the JPS Illustrated Children’s Bible, an excellent, award winning resource for your family, as is of course a copy of the Tanakh for older readers.  Whichever you prefer, you will find some excellent discussion questions and activities for Torah Study in the Speak Volumes Guide for this month.

Happy Reading!

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review came from my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase. You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

This month our Eilu D’varim/These are the obligations journey has us looking at Ahavaat Shalom Bein Adam Lachaveiro/Making Peace Among People. I find myself  recallng the words to The Hammer Song (by Lee Hays and Pete Seeger,) which my family sings every year at our Passover Seders.

“If I had a hammer/I’d hammer in the morning/I’d hammer in the evening/All over this land/I’d hammer out /I’d hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters/All over this land.”

What I love most about this song is how it is so focused on the individual. It does not talk about the hammering of a group, a committee, a country or the world. No, just one individual with his or her hammer, bell and song is running around hammering, ringing and singing about “love between my brothers and my sisters.” So simple, yet that is all it takes. One person, each one of us, taking our talents in hand and making our families more peaceful, our communities more peaceful, our world more peaceful. Imagine.

Oh, and that was another great song.

Here is a list of wonderful books about peace that may help you and your family find some of those hammers, bells and songs.

A Little Peace by Barbara Kerley. National Geographic Society, © 2007.  Ages 3-6. Each individual has the ability to spread “a little peace” wherever they go.

Peace Week in Miss Fox’s Class by Eileen Spinelli. Illustrated by Anne Kennedy. Albert Whitman & Company, © 2009. Ages 4-8. Miss Fox’s students are constantly bickering with each other, and she is tired of listening to it. She declares “Peace Week,” a week of respect and kindness for everyone. It starts out to be very difficult, but after a few days, the class is wondering why every week isn’t Peace Week.

Paulie Pastrami Achieves World Peace written and illustrated by James Proimos. Little, Brown Books for Young Readers, © 2009. Ages 4-8. At seven years of age, Paulie Pastrami began to make the world a better place by doing small things like being kind to animals and taking care of plants. When he decided he must achieve World Peace, he got a lot of cupcakes, his dad to drive him around, and … well, you can read the rest

Cain & Abel: Finding the Fruits of Peace by Sandy Eisenberg Sasso. Illustrated by Joani Keller Rothenberg. Jewish Lights Publishing., © 2001. Ages 6-9. The biblical story (Genesis 4: 1-16) of the first case of sibling rivalry is retold here in a way that explores the reasons for Cain’s anger, the cause of Abel’s death and the lasting effects of both on today’s world.

Peace One Day: The Making of World Peace Day by Jeremy Gilley. Illustrated by Karen Blessen. G.P. Putnam’s Sons, © 2005. Ages 8-11. One person can make a difference, as Jeremy Gilley proves with his persistence in writing letters and travelling the world in order to get two country’s leaders to sponsor a World Peace Day amendment at the United Nations.

The Cupcake Club: Peace, Love and Cupcakes by Sheryl Berk and Carrie Berk. Sourcebooks, Inc., © 2012.  Ages 9-12. How do you take on someone who is making your life miserable? By doing something delicious.

The Plain Janes by Cecil Castellucci. Illustrated by Jim Rugg. Minx, © 2007. Ages 11-15. When her parents move her out of New York City and into the suburbs, Jane thinks her life is over. Then she meets a group of girls who meet her standards for “changing the world.”

The Surrender Tree: Poems of Cuba’s Struggle for Freedom by Margarita Engle. Ages 13-18. Henry Holt and Company, © 2008. Using free verse, Margarita Engle tells the story of a freed slave who becomes a healer watching her country fighting for freedom.

Please feel free to use the discussion questions and activities provided in the Speak Volumes Guide for this month to help you discuss Ahavaat Shalom Bein Adam Lachaveiro/Making Peace Among People with your children.

Happy Reading,

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review came from publishers as review copies, my personal collection and my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase. You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

What a journey we are on with the Eilu D’varim prayer. Last month, we were dancing with newlyweds. This month we are burying the dead.  In fact, this month’s mitzvah (good deed) L’vayat hameit/helping the deceased have a proper burial and comforting the mourners is one of the highest we can perform, because the dead cannot return the favor.

It has always struck me how completely right-on Judaism is when it comes to the rituals surrounding death and mourning.  From what we say when we hear the news to how intense and how long our grieving lasts, these rituals require the participants to face the reality of the situation, provide for the inevitable and necessary grief and bring us out of this difficult process healthy and whole.

I remember my first experience attending a Jewish funeral. It was many years ago, prior to my conversion to Judaism. I had attended funerals for Catholic family members and Christian friends, so the funeral part was not new to me. However, there was so much different that took place during the Jewish funeral that, I have to admit, I felt as though I had never been to a funeral before.

Even now so many years later, what stands out for me was actually participating in the burial. Since this funeral occurred not long after my grandmother had passed away, I was still feeling sad about walking away from her gravesite, leaving her casket unattended awaiting others to bury her. Now, here I was actually able to make sure this individual was secure in his final resting place, sheltered by the blanket of dirt I helped lay there. Was it difficult? Yes, I sobbed like a baby as I dropped my shovels full of dirt in and listened to them hit the casket wood. Yet the finality of it, the reality of it, was so healing.

The following books are excellent resources for discussing this important life cycle event with children and learning about the mitzvah (good deed) of L’vayat hameit/helping the deceased have a proper burial and comforting the mourners:

Lifetimes: The beautiful way to explain death to children by Bryan Mellonie. Illustrated by Robert Ingpen. © 1983. Bantam Books.  Ages 3-7.  In this simple, yet beautiful book with gorgeous illustrations, the idea that everything has a beginning and an ending and a lifetime in between is explained in a way that even a young child can comprehend.

Where is Grandpa Dennis? by Michelle Shapiro Abraham. Illustrated by Janice Fried. © 2009. URJ Press. Ages 6-10. In this highly sensitive and beautifully illustrated book, a young girl wants to know about her grandfather who died long before she was born. As her mother explains Jewish traditions such as placing a rock on the gravestone and lighting a yahrzeit (anniversary) candle for remembering a loved one who has died, she searches for the best way to explain where Grandpa Dennis is now.  Together mother and daughter discover an answer that feels right for them.

When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death by Laurie Krasny Brown. Illustrated by Marc Brown. © 1996. Little Brown and Company. Ages 5-9. This excellent book discusses the difference between alive and dead, the different religious and cultural death customs and how a person might feel about the death of a loved one or pet. A great resource for parents.

The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst. Illustrated by Erik Blegvad. © 1971. Simon & Schuster. Ages 5-9. When Barney, the cat, dies his owner must think of ten good things to say about him at the back yard funeral. He can only come up with nine until his dad helps him think of a very special tenth.

Alvin Ho: Allergic to Dead Bodies, Funerals, and Other Fatal Circumstances by Lenore Look. Illustrated by LeUyen Pham. © 2011. Schwartz & Wade Books. Ages 8-10. Alvin Ho, who is afraid of everything, agrees to go to his GungGung’s (grandfather’s) best friend’s funeral. Even with all his preparations, he is not sure he is brave enough to look death in the face and survive.

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson. © 1977. HarperCollinsPublishers. Ages 9-12.  When the new kid – a girl – beats Jess in the first fifth-grade school yard race of the year, he is unspeakably angry. But then he finds himself defending her, Leslie, to the other kids and a forever friendship forms.

The Big Wave by Pearl S. Buck. © 1948. Harper Trophy. Ages. 11-14. In this classic story by a Nobel Prize winning author, Kino, a farmer’s son, and Jiya, a fisherman’s son, live on a small island where everyone is afraid of something in the natural world. When tragedy strikes, they both learn an important lesson about how to appreciate everything life has to offer.

Two additional, yet out-of-print, picture books are worth looking for in your local library or online used book websites (i.e. www.abebooks.com/ , www.betterworldbooks.com/ ) A Candle for Grandpa: A Guide to the Jewish Funeral for Children and Parents by David Techner and Judith Hirt-Manheimer provides an excellent and detailed explanation of the Jewish mourning process for families with young children. Kaddish for Grandpa in Jesus’ Name Amen by James Howe can assist a family with interfaith connections in understanding and honoring both Christian and Jewish tradition after a parent’s (or other close relative’s) death.

Please feel free to use the discussion questions and activities provided in the Speak Volumes Guide for this month to help you discuss this topic with your children.

Happy Reading,

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review came from publishers as review copies, my personal collection and my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase. You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

Here is my list of Tu B’Shevat Books for 2012:

Green Bible Stories for Children by Tami Lehman-Wilzig. Illustrated by Durga Yael Bernahard. ©2011. Kar-Ben Publishing. Ages 8-11. In this extraordinary book, several Torah stories are looked at for their view toward protecting the environment. The story is retold in age appropriate language and then a series of activities is provided to link the story to the world today.

Dear Tree by Doba Rivka Weber. Illustrated by Phyllis Saroff. ©2010. Hachai Publishing. In this endearing story, a young boy writes a New Year’s (Tu B’Shevat)  letter to his tree wishing it all good things for the year to come. The lovely illustrations show, in detail, exactly what the boy hopes the tree receives – sunlight, rain, birds, bees, strength, etc. The boy promises to take good care of his tree and knows, in return, the tree will provide fruit and shade.  As appropriate for Earth Day as for Tu B’Shevat.  (Ages 3-8)

Gabby & Grandma Go Green written and illustrated by Monica Wellington. ©2011. Beginning with sewing the bags they will use to go shopping, Gabby and her grandmother shop at the Farmer’s Market, walk to the park, recycle their plastic bottles and newspapers and check out Earth Day books at the library. Instructions for making cloth bags and many “Green Tips” accompany the simple text. The brightly colored pictures are a collage of cut-out photographs and gouache on paper artwork.  (Ages 3-7)

A Grand Old Tree written and illustrated by Mary Newell DePalma. ©2005. Arthur A. Levine Books. The life cycle of trees is explained in this marvelously simple yet eloquent book. The bright, colorful tissue paper collage illustrations show a tree filled with life, branching out, creating new trees and finally aging until it’s branches wither back into the earth where it gives life to another generation of trees. (ages 3-7)

Who Will Plant a Tree? By Jerry Pallotta. Illustrated by Tom Leonard. ©2010. Sleeping Bear Press. An amazing fact of nature is the different ways seeds have found to disperse themselves. Some seeds have developed burrs to stick to the fur coats of black bears, others have tough coverings to withstand being coughed up by an owl or pooped out by an elephant, and even others have developed parachutes to float in the wind. Whatever it is seeds find their way around the environment in a variety of interesting and wily ways. Using simple language and extraordinarily beautiful illustrations, this book for young readers makes it clear that from horses to humans, we all have a role in planting trees around the world. (Ages 4-8)

As you find ways to celebrate the trees around you during this Tu B’Shevat remember these beautiful words from Rabbi Shneour Zalman (1745-1813):

“All that we see — The heaven, the earth, and all that fills it — All these things are the external garments of God.”

As such, they should be respected and protected.  May you have a wonderful holiday.

Happy reading.

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review were provided by the publisher, my local public library or are from my own collection.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon,

I may receive a very small commission on your purchase.

You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

The marriage of two people committed to sharing a lifetime together is cause for a celebration. Children invited to this magical event bring energy, laughter and a sense of wonder as they ask their elders questions about the meaning of every rite and ritual, the relationship of this or that person to them and for information about weddings past, present and future.  Offering children the opportunity to share blessings for the couple in the form of small drawings or written words is one way to make their presence even more meaningful.

The following books are wonderful examples of the joy children can bring to the mitzvah (good deed) of Hachnasat Kallah/Celebrating the Wedding Couple:

Grandma’s Wedding Album by Harriet Ziefert. Paintings by Karla Gudeon. © 2011. Blue Apple Books. Ages 4-7. Designed to look like a picture album, Grandma shows her grandchildren, Emily and Michael, “photos” from her wedding to Poppy describing how they met, got engaged and were married. The photo/paintings are joyful, beautiful and colorful. The back of the book lists wedding traditions from all over the world.

Nadia’s Hands by Karen English. Illustrated by Jonathan Weiner. © 1999. Boyds Mill Press. Ages 5-8. Nadia, a Pakistani-American girl, has been chosen to be the flower girl for her Aunt Laila’s wedding. This means her hands will be painted with lovely designs and flowers using dye called henna. Nadia worries that the dye will be on her hands when she returns to school following the wedding. How will she explain the red shapes and lines on her hands to her classmates?

Donovan’s Big Day by Lesléa Newman. Illustrated by Mike Dutton. © 2011. Tricycle Press. Ages 4-7.  Donovan has a BIG job to do, but he has a lot of things to remember before he can get his BIG job done. After all, he is the ring bearer at the wedding of his two moms, so he better get up on time, eat his breakfast, stay clean, greet everyone…

Uncle Peter’s Amazing Chinese Wedding by Lenore Look. Illustrated by Yumi Heo. © 2006 Atheneum Books for  Young Readers. Ages 4-8 years. How will Jenny be her Uncle Peter’s favorite girl if he is getting married? Jenny decides to do everything she can to stop the wedding so her Uncle will continue to love her most of all. The hilarious results may inspire playful kids, but they will learn a lot about Chinese wedding traditions in the process.

Wedding Flowers by Cynthia Rylant. Illustrated by Wendy Andeson Halperin. © 2002. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. Ages 6-9 years. This is Book 6 of the Cobble Street Cousins Series, although one does not have to have read the previous books to read this one.  The cousins return to Cobble Street to help Aunt Lucy with her wedding to Michael.

Brenda Berman, Wedding Expert by Jane Breskin Zalben.   Illustrated by Victoria Chess. ©2009. Clarion Books. Ages 6-9 years. Brenda Berman knows that a flower girl in a gold lamé dress with sparkly shoes makes any wedding special. Of course, when her Uncle Harry announces his engagement, Brenda is thrilled that her flower girl dreams have arrived. Unfortunately, the bride and her niece have other plans. Can Brenda save the day and plan the perfect wedding?

The Wedding Planner’s Daughter by Coleen Murtagh Paratore. © 2005. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers.   Ages 9-12 years. Twelve-year-old Willafred “Willa” Havisham  has travelled everywhere with her mother , Stella, a first-class wedding planner. All she wants is to settle down somewhere and find a father. When it appears her wish may at last come true, disaster strikes and her mother packs their bags again.

Sister of the Bride by Beverly Cleary. © 1996. HarperCollins. Ages 11-14 years. Barbara’s sister, Rosemary has announced she is getting married. At first Barbara is very excited, but once the wedding plans begin, the world seems to center around Rosemary. Barbara and her younger brother, Gordy, are shoved to the side-lines. At least that is how they feel. Barbara begins to wonder, “What is so great about getting married anyway?”

Providing children with opportunities to observe how brides and grooms are nurtured by the community allows them to understand the delights and responsibilities of marriage from many points of view. This is a lesson we are never too young to acquire. Share this message a little more with the discussion questions and activities provided in the Speak Volumes Guide for this month.

Happy Reading,

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review came from publishers as review copies, my personal collection and my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase. You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.

Such was the case a few years ago when I was diagnosed with a meningioma (a tumor located on the brain) and required immediate surgery.  Needless to say, neither I nor my family was expecting such a sudden medical crisis. Fortunately, I had a large community of family, friends and colleagues- even people I did not know-willing to help us out with everything from cooking meals to sitting with me in the hospital to sending cards, books and letters of encouragement. My Temple’s Caring Community brought a hand-knit “Healing Shawl” which I still put on occasionally when I feel the need.  As my family and I focused on getting me well, our everyday worries, like getting dinner ready, were taken care of by people we knew and trusted. While I did my best to say thanks to everyone who helped us during those stressful days, there will never be enough words. My family and I try our best to “pay it forward” by helping out whenever we hear of someone in need. The soup pot starts boiling, the cookies begin baking, and we sign up for a dinner.

The following books can be helpful as you and your family explores the mitzvah of Visiting the Sick/Bikkur Cholim:

A Sick Day for Amos McGee. Written by Philip C. Stead. Illustrated by Erin E. Stead, ©2010. Roaring Brook Press.  Ages 3-6.  In this exquisite, Caldecott Award winning book, Amos McGee, a fabulous zookeeper, arrives on time every day to take care of all the wonderful animals. He makes sure to drop by his particular friends to make sure they receive some special attention. However, one morning he wakes up sick and does not come to work. That day, Amos receives some special attention of his own.

The Sniffles for Bear. Written By Bonny Becker. Illustrated by Kady MacDonald Denton, © 2011. Candlewick Press. Ages 3-6. Certain that “no one had ever been as sick as he,” Bear awaits his end. Even a visit from his overly cheerful friend mouse cannot sem to turn the tide, until while writing his will…

Say Hello, Lily. Written by Deborah Lakritz.  Illustrated By Martha Avilés, ©2010. Kar-Ben Publishing. Ages 5-8.  Lily wants to go with her mom to visit her elderly neighbor, Mrs. Rosenbaum, who has just moved into Shalom House, the local nursing home. However, when Lily walks into the lobby, she is overwhelmed by the number of new faces who all want to get to know her at the same time. She suddenly turns very shy. It does not take too many visits before she learns everyone’s names and stories. Soon she has a surprise for all her new friends.

The Princess of Borscht. Written by Leda Schubert. Illustrated by Bonnie Christensen, ©2011. Roraring Brook Press. Ages5-8. Ruthie’s grandma is in the hospital. When Ruthie goes to visit, Grandma tells her that the hospital food is terrible. Ruthie hears that if her grandmother does not get a bowl of borscht by 5:00 PM she is going to die of starvation.  Ruthie has never made borscht, so she seeks out the neighbors’ help. The result is hilarious, think Top Chef meets Nickelodeon.

Mr. Putter & Tabby Catch the Cold. Written By Cynthia Rylant. Illustrated by Arthur Howard, © 2002. Harcourt, Inc. Ages 7-10. Mr. Putter catches a cold when he goes outside on a wintery day without his hat.  With the help of his friendly neighbor, Mrs. Teaberry and her wonderful dog Zeke, it turns out to be the best cold Mr. Potter ever caught.

The Lemonade Club. Written and illustrated by Patricia Polacco, © 2007. Philomel Books. Ages 8-11.  “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade” is the motto of Miss Wichelman’s fifth-grade class. Make sure you have your tissue boxes on hand as you read this true-life story about friends helping friends through some difficult times.

Drums, Girls & Dangerous Pie. Written by Jordan Sonnenblick, © 2004. Scholastic Press, Inc. Ages 10-15. Steven is a fairly normal 13-year-old boy in middle school. He is a gifted jazz drummer, dreams about the prettiest girl in school and gets decent grades. Until his 5-year-old brother is diagnosed with leukemia and his entire life is turned upside down.

Fever, 1793. Written by Laurie Halse Anderson, © 2000. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers. Ages 12-16. When a yellow fever epidemic hits Philadelphia, Matilda Cook finds herself alone in having to face a city in terror. Based on real events.

God is in the Pancakes. Written by Robin Epstein, © 2010. Dial Books. Ages 14 -18. Fifteen-year-old Grace Manning loves being a candy striper at her local nursing home. She especially loves assisting her patient Mr. Sands, who has Lou Gehrig’s disease. They joke around as he teaches her to play and cheat at poker. Then one day he asks her to “help him die.”

As you read these books, discuss them with your children using the “Speak Volumes” guide. The questions and activities will provide you with many opportunities to become comfortable with Visiting the Sick/Bikkur Cholim in a variety of settings. Whether you find you are most at ease in the home of an ailing friend, in a nursing home visiting an elderly relative or in the trauma ward of your local hospital, Visiting the Sick/Bikkur Cholim is an important mitzvah/good deed that plays a significant role in repairing the world. Find where you are most comfortable and make a visit. It will do you and those you visit a world of good.

Happy Reading,

Kathy B.

©2012 Kathleen M. Bloomfield and forwordsbooks.com all rights reserved.
Books used in this review came from publishers as review copies, my personal collection and my local public library.
I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a book title referred to on my web site and purchase it from Amazon, I may receive a very small commission on your purchase. You will incur no additional cost, however.

I appreciate your support.